Ready-made scripts for handling team disagreements, client tensions, and vendor issues without making things worse.
DEAR stands for Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce. Use this structure for any difficult conversation. It keeps things factual and forward-looking instead of emotional and backward-looking. Fill in the template below for a conflict you are currently facing or one you expect.
Use this when two team members are in disagreement, or when you need to address a performance or behaviour issue. Open with: "I want to talk about [specific situation] because I value this working relationship and I want to sort it out." Stay factual. Avoid words like "always" and "never." End with a clear agreement on what happens next.
Use this when a client pushes back on scope, price, timeline, or creative direction. The goal is to hold your position without damaging the relationship. Lead with understanding, then redirect to the facts. Example opener: "I hear your concern about [issue], and I want to make sure we find the right path forward."
Use this when a freelancer or vendor delivers below expectations. Be direct but professional. They are running a business too. Example opener: "I want to give you clear feedback on the last deliverable so we can get aligned going forward."
Keep these in your back pocket for any tense moment. They buy you time, show respect, and keep the conversation productive. Copy the ones that feel natural to you, or adapt them in your own words below.